Being single is one of those few things that you either love or hate. To help you decide, here is my list of why I think it rocks at best and sucks at worst:
67 Reasons Why Being Single is Awesomeness in 3D
1. You can lie down on your bed diagonally, with arms wide open, and you won’t be bothered.
2. You can fart unapologetically.
3. It feels great to walk around the flat naked without having to worry that someone might walk in.
4. The only mess you will have to clean is yours.
5. You can spend all your money to yourself.
6. No arguments every hour.
7. No drama every minute.
8. No silly misunderstanding everyday.
9. Not a single petty fight even.
10. You stop acting like a 16 year old.
11. All the time in the world is subject to your disposal.
12. No one will tell you “do this, do that.”
13. You don’t have to take or make any phone call except when it’s your girlfriends dragging you on an all-nighter.
14. Your happiness is in your hands and not on someone else’s, literally and metaphorically. Hallelujah!
15. You never have to worry about buying the perfect gift.
16. Guess who’s in control of the television!
17. And the a/c too!
18. You never have to worry about someone waking up from your snore.
19. You can play your favorite songs in full volume and no one will give a shit other than your neighbors.
20. You never have to pretend that your idea of a Friday night is watching a football match.
21. Lots of evenings to spend with the ladies.
22. No one’s going to disappoint you
23. And you’re not going to disappoint anyone.
24. You can focus more on yourself.
25. You get to know yourself better.
26. No reason to adjust your schedule.
27. All those sleepless nights? Gone. Say hello to sleep!
28. You don’t have to worry about bad breath in the morning.
29. Your mum and dad are delighted that you came to visit.
30. Your friends who thought you died for a little bit are now enjoying your resurrection.
31. Being single means you are getting close to knowing exactly what you want.
32. You can go out on fun dates and meet new, and hopefully interesting people.
33. Did I already say you can go out on fun dates?
34. If you’re thinking about going on a six month trip around the world, then this is the right time! You don’t have to worry about leaving anyone or trying to sustain a soon-to-be long distance relationship.
35. Your Friday night could mean sleep overs with your girlfriends, a romantic-comedy flick, and pop corn. Awesome!
36. You can now start reading the books you bought but never read because you were always spending time with your bf-now-turned-exbf.
37. You become a new person-a smarter, stronger, sexier one.
38. Revenge diet!
39. You can start singing in the shower again.
40. In fact, you can even leave the bathroom door open!
41. You can see things much better and clearer now.
42. You have sound judgment.
43. You’re not trying to change anyone.
44. No one is trying to change you.
45. You define what emotional maturity and security is.
46. You’re back to being you. Thank goodness you’re so over and done the girlfriendzilla phase, or that you have escaped boyfriendstein.
47. Your last relationship taught you what you will and will not accept.
48. Therefore, it raises the bar higher for next time.
49. You can dance to a Britney Spears song in front of your mirror.
50. You can eat sushi for breakfast, pad thai for lunch, and laksa for dinner because you no longer have a boyfriend who has no appreciation for Asian cuisine.
51. You don’t have to fake orgasm.
52. Christmas costs less.
53. It means more money to splurge on dresses, or traveling, and books.
54. You never have to share the last bite of your burrito to anyone.
55. Suddenly, there’s more space in your studio apartment.
56. The only annoying friends you have to deal with are your own.
57. Everything is done your way. Your choices, your decisions.
58. You can fling and flung your dirty clothes here and there without any thoughts whatsoever.
59. No one else is going to raid your fridge!
60. On weekends, you can sleep whenever.
61. And wake up whenever.
62. The only dishes you’ll have to wash are yours.
63. You never have to explain why you’re late, except to your boss.
64. Now you have a legitimate excuse to drunk text and call someone an asshole. Kidding!
65. The bag of chips you left in the kitchen will never again magically disappear.
66. You can watch every single Katherine Heigl movie without interruption.
67. You can always get a guaranteed spot in the cinema.
32 Reasons Why Being Single Sucks in HD
1. You have no one to say good night to.
2. No back rubs and massages.
3. Everyone’s asking “when are you getting married?” when they should be setting you up on dates.
4. When you’re with someone, you can say goodbye to awkward first dates.
5. You hang out with your friends and you’re always the third, fifth, or heck, seventh wheel.
6. No spooning.
7. No cuddling.
8. No one to kiss and make love with.
9. It’s always a Friday night that makes things more obvious than usual. While your friends are home with their special someone and take away dinner, you are home alone, with a grumbling tummy.
10. You have no travel buddy.
11. When you get sick, there’s no other person who will magically appear with a bowl of fresh noodle soup.
12. All the butterflies in your stomach are nowhere to be found.
13. Winter is coming and no one will keep you warm. Except your oversized jumpers.
14. You get this pity look from strangers when you sit in a restaurant and eat alone.
15. You never know what to do on a weekend.
16. There is no one to hold hands with especially when a scene in the movie becomes too morbid.
17. You’re the only one watching Skyfall alone.
18. There is no such thing as candlelit dinner for one.
19. There are days when you feel empty.
20. There are evenings when all you can do is look at your bedroom door long enough. As if that can make someone appear out of thin air.
21. A marathon of The Big Bang Theory is less fun without anyone to watch it with.
22. After watching a Katherine Heigl movie, you just feel like getting ice cream and screaming at the top of your lungs, “F U, Katherine Heigl!”
23. Your social calendar is usually empty.
24. You can disappear for days and no one will even notice, which leads us to a gruesome number 25.
25. You can die and no one will know until your body rots to stink.
26. The closest thing you can get to amazing sex is free porn.
27. No one is willing to listen to your boring stories, not even your rottweiler.
28. Apart from your reflection in the mirror, there is no one else to boost your ego.
29. Everything seems dull. There is no up, no down. You’re just cruising in the middle.
30. Your mum and dad tries to set you up with their business partner’s son. Nightmare.
31. You have to put an effort in meeting new people again. Expect that some of them might turn out creepy like your mum and dad’s business partner’s son.
31. Most of your dinners are left overs.
32. On New Year’s, when the clock strikes 12, everyone will be smooching around including you. Except you have no one to smooch around with.