Come away with me

I know this will sound crazy. I’m crazy and you already know that. You’re crazy and I already know that. But what I want is to forget all about that craziness for a minute and just let ourselves go, without too much thinking or reason.

I want you to just take my hand and come away with me. Walk beside me as we turn to corners and enter streets in the city that we’ve never been at before. Let’s catch the perfect sunset in the harbor, or we can start chasing ibis and sea gulls at the fish market.

Take my hand as we take the next bus. Sit beside me and let’s go out of town. We will watch the people in the bus and make up stories about them as we head off to where we are going. Or we can watch the changing views from our window–the ambiance of urban structures to the calm of the country side to wherever it will take us.

Be patient with me. Soon enough, we will get there. Only a few hours and we’ll be there.

But where is “there” you might ask. Maybe it’s at your kitchen in Bondi where we can finally put your carbonara recipe to the test. Maybe it’s at a crazy house party. We’re not invited, but we’ll crash anyways! Maybe it’s in a far-flung area outside Sydney where we won’t do anything other than take pictures of things familiar and unfamiliar.

Take my hand as we search for our boarding gate. Rest your head on my shoulder as we take off. Let’s watch as the cars and buildings start looking like Lego miniatures. Let’s look at the sky and see what shapes the clouds take. While up in the air, let’s see the things beyond us and resolve in comfort knowing that we can face anything and everything that lies ahead. Feel the change of atmosphere as we step out of the airport and into a new world. Bali, Sydney, Manila, Cairo, Isle of Wight. Let’s tick one destination off our bucket list at a time, as we collect memories and embrace new adventures. We’ll count how many variety of curry dishes there is on the menu, we’ll try every shisha flavor available. We’ll go see the pyramids, we’ll watch a football game. We’ll look at old buildings, and enter ancient buddhist temples. We’ll count the stars as we lie our bodies across an open field. Our eyes will open at the first sight of a new morning. We’ll watch as the colors change from purple-grey to a gleaming orange sunrise. Another day–foreign and new–is waiting for us.

During the day, let’s discover and submerge ourselves in a new culture. We’ll spend time talking with other travelers we meet on the way. We’ll speak to locals and listen to their stories. And when we’ve finally had our fill of good food and wine, we’ll come back to our hostel and fit ourselves comfortably on our bed. We will sleep happy, and smiling, knowing that there will be breakfast and tea and you and me in the morning.

Get in the cab with me. We don’t know where we’re going but we’ll ask the driver to take us somewhere. Let’s roll the window down and feel the breeze in our hair. Let’s keep going for as long as we can. We won’t stop, unless we’re hungry. We’ll stop at gas stations for bathroom breaks, at restaurants for dinner specials, at pubs for happy hours. But we will continue our travel until we reach our happy place. Until we’re standing at the beach with the smell of the Pacific in front of us. Until the crisp sound of palm leaves surround us.

We’re outlaws, travelers, lovers, companions, explorers, triers of new things. We’re witnesses of whatever it is that is out there. Sometimes we won’t talk, we won’t touch, we will just be there, standing side by side. And we will fall in love, not with each other, but with the unknown. We will fall in love with the things we can’t see, we will love the things we don’t understand.

Take my hand and do this with me because I want to get carried away with you. I want to see new things with you. I want to do old things with you knowing that it will feel brand new because it will be the first time I’m doing it with you. I want to explore with you beside me, with our eyes full of curiosity and wonder, and our hearts just as free. I want to walk on roads we’ve never walked on before, hear languages we’ve never heard or spoken before. I want to get lost with you. I want to be found with you.

We will touch things, and taste flavors, and see life the way we never did before. Everything will be new. You will be new, and so will I.

It doesn’t matter that I don’t know you, or that you don’t know me, or the fact that we’ve never met before, because today, at this very moment, I just want you to take my hand and get carried away with me.

A letter to my hypothetical boyfriend part 2

I didn’t meet a Kyle or an Amadeus last night. That means I have no boyfriend with a sexy name, nor someone to call A. I met a Ziko, a Peter, and a Jasper, but none of them were you.

I was hoping you would come to the bus station last night but you didn’t. My friends came to save me from boredom. We went to a cafe to pass time. I have such awesome friends who always have my back and I consider myself lucky, but what I wanted was to be able to count on you too.

On the trip, I sat to a guy who started snoring as soon as the bus moved, and I was definite he wasn’t you either.

I still haven’t met you, but I am not losing heart, I can feel that you exist, it’s just unfortunate that our paths have not crossed yet.

If you were with me today, you would have been so proud of me! I managed to get free breakfast buffet today without even trying. I reckon I could have gotten a free breakfast for two, but what’s the point of that when, clearly, you’re not around?

I would have been happy, and I would have had a big breakfast, but everywhere I look, I see couples holding hands and kissing each other. It made your absence more obvious than usual.

I thought I would see you at the beach today, but obviously that wasn’t the case. I spent the entire day with my girlfriend instead.

Her name is Sophy, and I think you will like her. It would have been so nice if you met her! She’s such a lovely woman and we’ve shared a year of friendship. I met her here in El Gouna exactly the same time last year, and since then I felt like she and I have history. I wish I can have that same history with you.

I would love for you to meet Sophy’s Ali too. He’s such a sweet, caring, funny guy and I can already tell that you guys will be good buddies!

It would have been nice if we went out on a double date tonight.

Sophy and Ali.

Jen and Kyle.

Or Jen and Amadeus.

Or heck, Jen and whatever-your-name-is!

But you weren’t with us, and thus, I was a third wheel by default.

We played pool! And we could have played doubles if you were here. I don’t know why I’m thinking we have a fair chance of winning over Sophy and Ali. I guess I will always have this bias towards you. I can’t help it, you’re my man.

I gave Sophy and Ali their first salsa class tonight, or let’s say I forced them into it! You forgot to show up. Were you really that busy?

I got us spicy beef nachos for dinner. I hope you love guacamole! I’m not really sure what you feel like having. And if you were here, then you could get whatever you want. I’ll even let you order for me, because if we are going to be together, I trust that you would know my taste and appetite more than anyone.

I had too much fruit drinks today–fresh cantaloupe juice, mango-coconut milkshake, a Florida mocktail. It was so refreshing, but it would have tasted much sweeter if we were sipping it from the same straw.

I didn’t go kite surfing today even when I badly wanted to because that will be unfair to you. I always thought it will be much cooler if we take the course together. But after your no-show, I’m convinced I should start the course even without you. I’m sorry, don’t take it the wrong way. I would really like to kite with you, but I know that you will understand. Perhaps when we meet each other, we can plan our first trip together.

I sat at one of the lazy chairs in front of our hotel. I looked at the sky and wondered if you have gotten lost. That is the only explanation I ccould think of. I sat there alone, admiring the stars when what I really wanted is to talk about what we’d like to do tomorrow.

By the way, I bought a new toothbrush for us, I hope you don’t mind sharing. You can get one for yourself if you want to, or I can go back to the supermarket and get you one if you promise to do the dishes three times a week for a month.

Deal?

Deal!

Where exactly are you? I didn’t meet you today. If I did, then I wouldn’t be writing this right now. Don’t you think it will be a lot easier if you can just tell me where to find you? Or where I should go so you can find me already? That way we don’t have to play this hide and seek game anymore.

I guess I should just go back to our room. Hang on, I meant my room because there is no our, there is no us, there is no we. There is not even a you.

Please prove me wrong. Please knock on my door next morning and wake me up from my sleep. Let me know that you are not just in my head, that you are not just imaginary.