Date a girl who dances salsa


Date a girl who dances salsa. She is feisty, driven, confident. She dances her way through life in a way that she can dodge a bullet in the most graceful fashion. She is strong–physically, mentally, emotionally. She has arms and legs made solid from hardcore dancing. She’s been stepped on countless times with a 4-inch stiletto, she has fallen face flat on the floor, but that doesn’t stop her from dancing. She knows that like dancing, life continues on with or without music.

A girl who dances salsa is not afraid to make mistakes because she takes every wrong turn as a learning curve. She is a girl with a curious soul and an open mind. She will try bachata or kizomba, hiphop, even rumba. She will say yes to a new form of dance even when she has zero knowledge about it because a girl who dances salsa is a girl who is thirsty to learn.

A girl who dances salsa gives and takes. She knows her favorite moves yet she will allow you to lead her from time to time knowing that in every dance she can learn something new. She is a good follower but that doesn’t stop her from being a good leader. She will tell you right in your face that you shouldn’t have pushed hard, or that you are out of beat. When she does that, be impressed because not everyone can be in-your-face honest nowadays. Even when you are leading her in the dance, she will find ways to make the dance extra special by adding her own touch to it.

Date a girl who dances salsa because she is a girl who has high appreciation for the arts and artists. She loves dancing salsa for its elegant art. She recognizes a good salsa song the moment the percussion starts to beat.

A salsera is a chameleon. She has rhythm within her. She blends in and makes fast connection with everyone and that is the same reason why she stands out. The moment she steps in a salsa event, watch her spend a decent half an hour just giving everyone a welcome hug and kisses hello. Everyone loves her around because she has a heart as big as the dance floor. She has good vibes and positive energy that will lift you out of your sorry mood.

When a salsera asks you how you are doing or how your day went, trust me, she really wants to know. Otherwise, she would not bother asking when she can just pull you for a dance without saying a word. So, take the time to let her know what you have been up to, for all you know, she is taking this as a window to know more about you.

A girl who dances salsa goes where the wind blows. She knows when to stand up for the love of her life, yet she knows when it is time to let go. Years of dancing salsa taught her that some people just comes and goes, the way it always does in rueda de casino. A salsera knows when to take a deep and rise from that deep. And believe me, she will rise to any deep much stronger than the fall.

It is easy to date a girl who dances salsa. Invite her for an 8:00pm dinner and she will be there right on time if not earlier. She won’t make you wait an hour or two because she knows how frustrating it is when a salsa event starts late. She values time. Every minute to a dance means a lot to her, so if you do ask her out on a date, be on time and see how much she will like you more for valuing her time’s worth.

A girl who dances salsa does not crack under pressure. She is in control and can fully take care of herself. She is composed and calm and she never loses herself. Dancing salsa taught her that feeling down doesn’t last too long. Sometimes, all it takes is a good salsa event to get her happy back.

A salsera (no matter how long she’s been dancing for, no matter how complex her knowledge is about the dance) keeps her feet grounded. She appreciates talent when she sees it. She has danced a bazillion times before but that does not get in her head. She is humbled by the fact that there is still so much to learn outside the dance floor. She is moved by the courage of beginners and takes pleasure in seeing them evolve and grow within the salsa scene. At the same time, she has high regards for dancers who have turned the soles of their shoes paper-thin from all those years of dancing.

A girl who dances salsa takes the time to know people. She knows that a salsa party is limited to dancing which is why she will ask you out for coffee where the environment is more chat-friendly. Better yet, if you meet a girl who dances salsa, ask her out for coffee or shisha. She will feel giddy inside and out knowing that you will go an extra length to spend time with her not only at a salsa party where meeting is just out of convenience.

It is easy to recognize a salsera. She is that girl in the gym who is listening to Dile El Amor in full blast while lifting three-kilo weights. She is that girl sitting at a corner with a huge bottle of mineral water because she knows she has to be hydrated if she plans on dancing for long. She is that girl with a spare bag where her dancing shoes are. A salsera doesn’t dance in knee-high boots, or 5 inch heels, or a Converse sneakers. She knows that a good pair of dancing shoes is essential to a good dance and a good party. Yes, she takes salsa seriously, because that is what a salsera does with everything she is passionate about.

When you meet a girl who dances salsa, ask her where the next salsa party is, if you’re lucky, she might even invite you to come. When she does, go. It means she wants you to have a slice of her life. Nothing connects people better than dancing. You feel the passion, the intensity, the chemistry, all these in a dance. You feel feelings. You feel when it’s right, and you can tell when it’s not.

A girl who dances salsa knows that at any second, anything can happen and change everything, and she will always be prepared for it. Nothing takes her by surprise. You can spin her around a dozen times, even more, but she will not get off balance. You can let her go for a freestyle and she will be more than happy to show you what she’s got. She knows that her favorite song will always come to an end and she will take it as a beginning to another dance, another song.

Date a girl who dances salsa because she can feel. She is an emotional creature and she is proud of it. One dance can express so much about a salsera. It exposes her being, her passion, her emotions. It’s easy to tell when she’s happy or sad–her facial expressions, hand gestures, and the way she sways her hips say it all.

Pain and vulnerability is something she takes pride in. These are the two things that makes her human. It satisfies her knowing that she is susceptible to hurt, and yet that won’t stop her from taking the leap. She knows that just like in a dance where she gets elbowed, and squeezed, and criticized and judged, life offers more and even harder challenges.

When a salsera says that she loves you, have no doubts because it is true. She knows that love can take away all her decision-making abilities but she will take the risk, knowing that most of the beautiful dances were never expected.

A girl who dances salsa understands that you are not superman, she knows that you can make mistakes and that you don’t know everything because she is a girl who sings and hums to Latin songs even when she doesn’t know or understand the words. She will accept your past and take you for your present, while looking forward more dances with you tomorrow. She is a girl who knows how to compromise. She knows that a relationship has the same theory as a partner dance.

A salsera is a girl who knows very well that love is and should be built in trust. You will see her dance with all the men at a salsa party but you have to know that there is nothing more she can ever want than to dance with you. In fact, she cannot even wait for the next bachata song to start so she could throw her arms around you already. You have to know that a girl who dances salsa will dance with everyone else but it is and will always be different when she dances with you.

A salsera is a girl who can make you feel different emotions in a span of thirty minutes–carefree in merengue, fun in chacha, sophisticated in salsa, passionate in bachata. That’s how she is, always enthused by the different flavors and tastes of life. She knows very well that some flavors she won’t like, some tastes she will detest but she will try it all with her head held high.

She understands that you can’t be with her 24/7 and that it is perfectly fine. Just like most salsa events that are scheduled, she knows you’ve got your own schedules too. She will give you time to be with your friends because she knows she needs time to spend with her girlfriends from salsa too.

A girl who dances salsa is never shallow. She is everything but that. So don’t worry, she is not quick to judge. First impressions do not impress her. No, it doesn’t work like that for our salsera because dancing has taught her that you cannot grasp someone’s personality or character even after months of dancing with them. She knows that salsa is a social venue where you meet people, but she is smart enough to know that real friendships are made outside the dancing floor.

You can tell that a girl dances salsa by that fact that she can’t stop talking about how much she would love to go to Cuba! If you got all the aces in your hand, she might even ask you if you’d like to go with her. If she does, do not hesitate. She wants you to be there at the happiest moment of her life.

When a girl who dances salsa falls in love, you will be her favorite dancer, you will be the most handsome Latino in her eyes even when you don’t dance salsa at all, even when you have two left feet.

A salsera will not push you to do what you don’t want to do because she knows how annoying it is to be dancing with someone who pushes his style and moves on her. At the same time, she knows that every dancer is their own person. She values identity, and independence, and differences more than anything else. You may not be her cup of tea but she will like you for all that you are because individuality is the very thing that attracted her to salsa in the first place. She will love you all the more for having your own sense of self, because you know what your strengths are and you can recognize your weak points when they’re shown.

Date a girl who dances salsa because when you are with her, it feels as though you are listening to an old song for the very first time. Love her because even when she’s danced with 138 different men, she is with you for the reason that she saw something in you that she hasn’t seen in any of those men. In a way, that should already make you feel good about yourself!

A girl who dances salsa is a girl who loves herself. She knows her worth, she knows what she deserves. She will not change for anyone. She will not allow anyone define who she is. She defines herself. You either love her for her totality or you don’t take anything at all. If you find that she is demanding, it is only because she will not let anyone, even the love of her life short-change her or take her for granted. She knows her rights and she won’t let anyone treat her any less. Rest assured, if a salsera loves you back, she will never short-change you, or treat you any less, or take you for granted because she knows your worth, she knows what you deserve.

Date a girl who dances salsa because she is the kind of girl who is beautiful inside and out. She knows she doesn’t have to prove herself–not to you, not to anyone–because she is her own woman. She is beautiful that way. There is something about her that remains attractive even when she has gone sweaty after three hours of dancing. Maybe it is the fact that unlike other girls who always try to look their best to impress, a salsera knows that beauty is never about make up or clothes. It is what is inside you. She is not superficial. She acknowledges beauty when she sees it but she knows how easily it can fade away.

A salsera is a girl who loves women. Nothing can be sexier than seeing a salsera admire another salsera. She treats every girl as an ally not an enemy. She believes in feminism and camaraderie. She knows that jealousy and intrigue and rumors and gossips exist only for the fascination of junior high girls. She sees beauty in everyone, no matter the size, no matter the shape, no matter the age or color. She knows that she doesn’t have to have a body of a latina to dance very well. She is comfortable in her own skin that she radiates no matter the beat, no matter the song.

A girl who dances salsa knows that life is not a fairytale. She has realistic goals, realistic dreams. She knows she can’t get or have everything she wants and she will not be disappointed. What do you think she does when not one of her favorite songs is played in a salsa event? You think she pouts her lips and throws a silly tantrum? No! She makes do of what she has. She is more than happy to dance in a new song. Sure, it might not be her favorite song, but that won’t stop her from dancing.

It is very easy to date a salsera. She doesn’t want a Prada bag or an expensive perfume. She knows that there is no way her dancing shoes and one liter water bottles will fit in a clutch bag. She knows that the scent of a perfume wears out just after a few dances. But give her your own mix of salsa music, or better yet, make a mix of her favorite Latin songs and see that look on her face that is priceless. She will hold the CD in her hands as though it is the world’s most expensive treasure. She will play it nonstop the moment she wakes up in the morning. That will continue throughout the day until she dozes off to sleep. And in between tracks, she will wish you are there listening with her if not dancing with her. Bravo, you just gave her the perfect gift she’s always wanted.

If you’re feeling a little bit extra cheesy, you don’t have to be flashy. Do it the old-school way. That Sneakers chocolate bar? It works like a charm everytime! It’s a no-brainer, she needs as much energy she can get for an all night of dancing. She will thank you for being thoughtful.

She won’t mind you dancing with other girls because she knows she can trust you. She doesn’t get jealous and there is no feeling of insecurity because she knows very well and will never forget what she means to you.

Is a girl who dances salsa worth it? Absolutely, in more ways than one! So when you find her, keep her. Don’t lose her with your insecurities or worse, out of jealousy, for when she says that she loves you, she means every word. After all, this is a girl who has met so many people at various salsa parties before. If she has chosen you, never let her go because you are more than lucky for the fact that out of all the men she has met and danced with, she fell in love with you. Thank the gods she didn’t choose that one awesome Cuban dancer, or that expat from Spain, or that sexy bachata instructor.

She must have seen something in you that makes her want to dance her way through life with no one else but you. And if you and her will have problems along the way, her judgement will not be clouded by what other people say. She loves you for who you are, not for who you can be, not for her idea of who you are. She loves you because you are you, right here, right now. She doesn’t need anyone to tell her you are not good enough, or that she deserves someone better. If you’ve been reading very intently, I think I have already stressed many times how a girl who dances salsa knows her worth and what she deserves. If she’s with you, she’s with you for a reason. You are someone worthy to dance with even when the music has stopped.

Date a girl who dances salsa. Make her feel that she is the best girl in the world. Let her know that she is safe, that you will catch her should she fall. Make her believe that no matter who she is dancing with or who you are dancing with, you will always be each other’s first and last dance.

Find a girl who dances salsa, because when you do, you’ll start living as though life is a dance floor. And with a salsera’s hand intertwined with yours, there is never a wrong turn. Only music in the background that has gotten much sweeter. And just in case you fall in love with a salsera, and you’re lucky enough that she falls in love with you too, congratulations! You just found yourself an epic partner on and off the dance floor!

66 responses »

  1. The most beautiful piece I have ever read! I never even thought of myself like that, but as I read it, I realised….wow! This is me. Confidence is sky high right now. Thank you!!!

  2. Why do I feel like I just read myself?… Even though I have done salsa dancing for many years, I wouldn’t have thought of myself like that. I thank you for writing this, it made me realise I am capable more than I thought, boost my confidence, and made me proud to be a salsera. Thank you!

  3. Nice article! Could similar be written for Salseros in general is the question..? I know my dad (who also dances) told me never to date in the salsa scene! Salseros can be infamously vain and known for their womanising ways. As someone truly passionate about salsa though, I think I would find it difficult to date someone who didn’t share that passion.. we’ll see!

    • I have been dancing salsa for the last 4 years, and I actually only dated one guy who also dances salsa. Later, I found out that he’s dated almost every girl in the sydney community. I have dated more guys outside salsa, guys who has no dancing bone whatsoever and it was a good balance because there are definitely times in the relationship when you need to do your own thing, and him as well. I guess that’s why I said that guys who don’t dance salsa should never feel insecure if they fall in love with a salsera because avid salseras dance for the love of dancing. It’s our sport! 😉

      • I enjoyed reading your article, am a mambo dancer same as salsa on2 dancer, I have only been dancing for two years, but some say I dance as if I have been dancing for six, It’s the love I have for it, I even had my first performance which was great, everyone told me that I would be nervous but my reply was no, simply because am no stranger to big crowds, until I told them I was once a performer and performed all around the world, so it was cake for me. I attend socials with no intentions of dating, just dancing and nothing more, guess because I have been single for nine years I know, hard to believe, oh did I mention, never have been married nor have children. enough about me, I truly enjoyed reading your article. Thank you for sharing 🙂 Happy New year

    • Your dad unfortunately contributes to an attitude that marginalizes plenty of good men who to want to follow the advice of dating a salsera but also happen to love salsa dancing. I’ve been dancing salsa for 7 years, and I have met and befriended plenty of great guys along the way. They and I are automatically branded as womanizers by many salseras out there through no fault of our own, and it’s pretty frustrating. But like you, I’ve always wanted to date someone who shares my passion for dance, so I pushed through it. Luckily my salsera gf ignored her friends who told her not to date a salsero and bothered to get to know me. We’ve been together over 1.5 years and counting now so :-p to the stereotype. And yes, she’s an amazing woman, just like this post describes :-). Guys from all walks of life dance salsa, and I assure you the good ones don’t suddenly turn into Rico Suave the moment they step into a salsa club or social. You just gotta get to know them the way you would with a guy you met anywhere else.

  4. Hey, I have one question regarding this part: “You can tell that a girl dances salsa by that fact that she can’t stop talking about how much she would love to go to Buenos Aires!” Why Buenos Aires?

    • I don’t think loving yourself is a bad thing. It’s not narcissism, it’s just you value yourself and I think that’s a beautiful thing, especially for women who are always caught second guessing themselves.

    Great article and I can tell it was very passionately written. I’m still very cautious of dancing in salsa scenes in the English speaking world. They can be very small communities and I don’t like the idea of disturbing the balance so to speak if it doesn’t work out. That said, life very seldom gives us a choice in who we fall for, salsera or not!

    • I absolutely agree. We can have a choice who we dance with, but not so much on who we will like. Earlier, there was a question on whether or not this article fits a salsero. I think you being a salsero would know.

  6. I really like this article. My friends always tell me that i have a high self esteem. I could never explain to them why that was so now I can honestly say its because I dance salsa. =) Thanks for sharing. just like the other ladies who have read this article and can relate to everything I can also relate.

  7. Date a Salsera because she will be the one reading this article and telling you about how cool is to be one! I love it, after many years of dancing, there is a trademark to all of us. This is the best profile that describes me, better that horoscope, Myers Briggs, DISC, etc. LOL. I should add it to my resume so they will know that I m going to a late bird, listen to music while I work, and have this need to dance to the slightest sound.

    Thanks for the recap! From a Salsera, bachatera…etc

  8. Im dating a salsera!. And she was in my mind this whole time I was reading this… .. I know im very lucky to have her because im the guy with the 2 left feet that doesnt know anything about salsa yet she chose me. And yes, thank god she didnt choose the a cuban dancer ha :p …. great article, im going to share this with her. 🙂

  9. So cheesy, but oh so true…haha. Thanks for writing this, Jennifer!
    When I finally get around to Egypt, I’ll be in touch 🙂

  10. Great article. I appreciate that you took the time to put forth a well integrated, thoughtful piece on salseras. There is a great deal of truth in it from my perspective, but only for those salseras that truly employ the methods and drive you speak about (granted there are a huge number that do not!).

    An alternative title for your article could be, “Marry a Salsera.”

    Why you ask??? Well, I think the evidence in this article was quite compelling. Besides that, I can only offer you my own story.

    I met my man in a salsa class 5 years ago (he had been dancing for years already and I was a couple years in). Now I must say, he really didn’t date in the salsa arena because he loves to dance and saw that there seemed to be a good deal of co-mingling going on. He thought better than to become part of that However, he made an exception for me because he felt like I was worth breaking a rule and he could see that I was marching to the beat of my own drum as well. I appreciated his boundary for obvious reasons (salseras know what I mean!!). However, I never knew that he had it because he clearly did not apply it to me…LOL.

    The sweet part about my story here is that I truly followed my passion (with salsa) and it led me on a long and wonderful journey, where I was able to grow and learn…right into my man’s arms.

    Dancing with other men was fun, sometimes challenging, and extremely telling. It helped me to recognize what I wanted in a man..and what I did not want!

    Fast forward 5 years….we are very happily married with children and I am soooo glad my amazing husband decided I was his one. Now I get to dance salsa with one of the most amazing salsa dancers anytime I want, for the rest of my life! That is probably every salseras fantasy!!!

    Kudos to you for sharing this article with the world!!!

    Now for the next question….who is going to take on the awesome assignment of writing about the salseros (generally speaking of course). And how will that article read??!!? Lol. Looking forward to reading it!


  11. Antes que nada me permito felicitar por el contenido de este articulo ,el baile es la mejor expresión del ser humano conjuga varios aspectos. y si son mujeres maravillosas, aun recuerdo la noche que por primera vez que baile con una mujer salsera ya nunca mas fui el mismo.

  12. Dear, these words made me smile and feel so proud of being a salsera!!
    Thanks a lot. I wish all our Salsa community reads this!!
    See you soon!

  13. Beautifully written and proud to be a salsera!! For those of you unsure about dating a salsero, I say it’s the best thing ever to share the same passion in dancing. My dear salsero tells me only I, dance the way I do; most beautiful 😉

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  15. Hi Cairogypsy, wonderful piece, very heartfelt. As a salsero it wasnt always comfortable reading but I ‘spose someone has to tell it how it is. Keep it up.

  16. nice article. one thing – when you say ‘dile al amor’ do you mean the Aventura bachata song? or a salsa version of it? maybe a famous salsa song might be a better example for your salsera… e.g. ‘lloraras’, ‘me libere’, ‘la cura’ or similar.

    keep writing!

  17. I can just say WOW!- such a beautifully written article. Profound insights into the depths of the souls of the girls & women who love to salsa. Of course, men absolutely need to read this so they can understand their ladies better and get to love and appreciate them even more.

    Also, I just wish more women read this inspiring article and started dancing salsa no matter what age they are to get more in tune with their bodies, to experience the joy of sensual movement, the feeling of adventure, passion and aliveness. It all translates to happiness… Yes, ladies, salsa will make you feel alive!

  18. Wow this is such a good article, I love it. And most of it is so true about us Salseras is true. This is such an amazing article.

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  20. I love this article! It is so true. It’s like you’re describing me. I read it a few times. Its Amazing! My compliments 🙂

  21. Most of this goes for almost any dancer any style ! I have love for lots of my dancer partners . Every one brings something new to the floor every one is special !

  22. Reblogged this on Grade A rambling and commented:
    As a fellow salsera, I’ve never read anything that made me feel so good and special in my life. I believe that I fulfill all these qualities, and I just really love this post! Shoutout to all my salseras/salseros!

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  25. I can’t thank you enough for writing this article. I am a salero in the making and I agree with all that you have said in it, (the parts I have experienced so far, I mean). I have many salsera friends and I can agree with your article based on what I have observed about them. A salsera is a gem to find, not just as a girlfriend but also as a friend. Thank you so much for a great post on a great topic!

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